February 2010
2 posts
Shark Attack In South Florida
The shark attack at Stuart Beach left one kite boarder dead, presumably killed by baby great white sharks (which probably weren’t very small or cute).
Stephen Howard Schafer was the 38-year-old victim. He was found floating face down in the water by a lifeguard that perused onto the unguarded beach a quarter mile from Stuart Beach in south Florida. Schafer died shortly after arriving to a...
What the HELL was Pink wearing at the Grammys?
Last night at the Grammys, I had the displeasure of watching Pink come out looking like an old woman in a headscarf. I thought: “Well that’s a rather unfortunate outfit for the Grammys.” Then the headscarf/dress came off and Pink was wearing… nothing.
I don’t know if you saw the Grammys, but you probably shouldn’t try looking up Pink’s Grammy performance...
January 2010
1 post
1 tag
Murder Over Twitter Battle
Kwame Dancy (@kwameasy 132) was murdered following a Twitter battle with life long friend Jameg Blake.
22-year-old Kwame Dancy exchanged threatening Twitter tweets with friend Jameg Blake following a verbal fight over a girl. Kwame Dancy was later shot in the neck with a shotgun by Jameg Blake, who has since been charged with first degree murder.
Police will be using tweets exchanged between...
November 2009
2 posts
Corduroy Skirts are a Sin!
“Corduroy skirts are a sin!” read a Syracuse University student’s sign as he stood beside a gay-basher preaching that homosexuality is a sin. The anti-gay woman protesting at a street corner near Syracuse University was attired in a brown corduroy skirt and a purple zip-up hoodie, a definite disaster by any standards.
The Syracuse student made his sign to shed humor on a...
The Penis Bridge
Have you seen the penis bridge?
October 2009
3 posts
Amelia Earhart was Eaten by Coconut Crabs
Amelia Earhart was eaten by coconut crabs, says Richards Gillespie, a researcher for The International Group for Historic Aircraft (TIGHAR).
TIGHAR claims that artifacts found on Nikumaroro Island suggest that Amelia Earhart crash landed on the island, which is overrun by coconut crabs. There, they claim, Amelia probably succumbed to injury and infection, food poisoning from toxic fish, or severe...
Marge Simpson in Playboy
Marge Simpson posed for Playboy in a series of scandalous pictures celebrating the 20th anniversary of The Simpsons. Marge Simpson’s pictures are the first cartoon photos to be featured in Playboy.
Here’s a sample of Marge’s Playboy pics. She has been reported to have “tasteful” photos taken in lingerie.
September 2009
3 posts
Woman Impaled by Tree
An Idaho woman was impaled by a tree while on a recreational drive with her husband.
Michelle Childers explains that while on her drive, a tree limb broke through the passenger side window. Childers says she then felt a “strange” pressure in her shoulder and neck. Michelle’s husband, Daniel, told her she had been impaled by the tree.
Childers was impaled by a 19-inch tree limb...
Drunk Man Throws Jellyfish
A 41-year-old drunk man was arrested after throwing jellyfish at spectators at Madeira Beach. The man was said to have been throwing jellyfish primarily at teens.
The man was also reported as having pretended to be drowning on multiple occasions that afternoon. He began collecting jellyfish after being taunted by spectators.
The 41-year-old who threw jellyfish is facing charges for being loud...
Cat with Arrow in Head
A cat with an arrow through its head returned home days after it went missing.
The 4-year-old cat named Brownie went missing from its suburb home. Upon its return, the cat’s owners were both delighted and horrified. Doctors say Brownie will make a full recovery, as the arrow only scraped the cat’s skull.
A local animal protection agency is offering $500 leading to the arrest of the...
August 2009
6 posts
Cats can clear a room when they shit, sure.
bryyando:
camiee:
BUT SHARKS CAN CLEAR A WHOLE FUCKING BEACH.
SUCKKKK MYYYYY DIIIIIICK!
HAHAHAHAHA
Update: Ryan Jenkins Found Dead!
Ryan Jenkins was found dead in a motel in Canada, just days after police began an avid manhunt in search for Jasmine Fiore’s alleged murderer. Jenkins was found hanging from a coat rack. Police believe Jenkins’ death was a suicide.
Remember that Jasmine Fiore was Jenkins’ ex-wife. Her body was found strangled and stuffed into a suitcase that was dumped in a dumpster the morning...
Ryan Jenkins Murders Jasmine Fiore, Wins $250,000
Ryan Alexander Jenkins, one of the 16 contestants from ‘Megan Wants a Millionaire,’ is suspected of having murdered his ex-wife, Jasmine Fiore. Jasmine Fiore was a swimsuit model who was rumored to have modeled for Playboy. Unfortunately, the Playboy pictures of Jasmine Fiore were fake.
After ‘Megan Wants a Millionaire’ was canceled, Ryan Jenkins fled to his homeland...
PETA Launches "Unhappy Meal" at McDonald's
In effort to scare the shit out of little children, PETA has launched the “Unhappy Meal” at McDonald’s locations. PETA thinks that McDonald’s tactics of appealing to children — with colorful, cheery “Happy Meals” — are deceitful and should instead be replaced with a more realistic look at how exactly the happy little burgers and fries found their way...
George Sodini Youtube Fail-Blog (Video)
George Sodini was the LA Fitness club shooter who shot and killed 3 women and injured 9 others before killing himself. George Sodini blogged about his suicidal thoughts and his hatred for women. George Sodini kept a blog and a Youtube account (now deleted). Sodini’s Youtube video blogs have been uncovered by Youtube users and are now spreading across the popular video site.
Below is a link...
July 2009
5 posts
Tim McLean Decapitated on Greyhound Bus
Tim McLean was the 22-year-old Canadian man who was stabbed repeatedly by a man sitting next to him on a Greyhound bus in Canada. McLean was asleep when the man stabbed him, and likely dead before he was decapitated.
After decapitating Tim McLean, the killer on the Greyhound bus waved the boy’s head in front of the 36 other passengers aboard.
One witness commented:
“Some people were...
Woman Suffocates Husband in Sex Game
Rebecca Bargy, 26, accidentally suffocated her husband to death during a sex game. Supposedly, Rebecca Bargy tied down and gagged 29-year-old James Bargy. Rebecca Bargy proceeded then to leave James tied and gagged in their mobile home while she went to have sex with a man she met on-line.
Rebecca Bargy was gone for 20 hours.
When Bargy returned, James had suffocated to death on the gag. Now,...
Man Cuts Off Penis to Spite Father
An Egyptian man in Cairo cut off his penis and mutilated his testicles to spite his father. The incident occurred after a two-year conflict between the two, where the son wanted to marry a girl from a lower class, which is unusual among higher Egytian social circles.
The Egyptian man used a heated knife to slice off his penis. He was taken to the hospital shortly after.
The man’s penis...
Dani Graves and Human Pet, Tasha Maltby, Kicked...
Dani Graves and Tasha Maltby, Graves’ human pet, were forcibly kept from riding a bus by a rather passionate bus driver. Dani Graves was supposedly leading Tasha Maltby by a leash onto a late night bus when he was attacked by the bus driver.
Dani Graves was grabbed and pushed out of the bus with Tasha Maltby and told, “We don’t let freaks and dogs like you on.”
Tasha...
June 2009
6 posts
Groomless Marriage Ceremony Ends in Valid Marriage
The Ditzel versus Bowser marriage case is between husband Matthew Ditzel and wife Heather Bowser. One year ago, at the Ditzel-Bowser wedding ceremony held in Florida, Matthew Ditzel refused to show up to his wedding. Heather Bowser, surprisingly, was unmoved and had the ceremony continue without him.
Matthew Ditzel and Heather Bowser were legally married that day, even though Matthew...
One in Four South African Men Have Committed Rape
A sample of 1,700 South African men has shown that at least one in four have committed rape, with about 73% of them having committed rape before they were 20.
The South African study, led by the Medical Research Council (MRC), shows the country’s endemic culture of sexual violence. And while South Africa has the highest levels of rape in the world, Professor Rachel Jewkes of the MRC stated...
Zombie Invasion Imminent! Harvard Psychiatrist Dr....
Dr. Steven Schlozman, a Harvard psychiatrist, claims that zombies display real-life symptoms, which can only mean one thing:
ZOMBIES ARE REAL!
Dr. Schlozman explains that zombies have a multitude of brain dysfunctions, including a cerebellar and basal ganglia dysfunction, which would make movements slow and irregular. A zombie appetite is also seemingly infinite, says Dr. Schlozman, which could...
Dead New Yorker Faces Four Parking Tickets
George Morales, 59, may have died of a heart attack after pulling his truck over off the Brooklyn-Queens Expressway in New York. While Morales’ body decomposed over the next four weeks, his car accumulated four parking tickets.
George Morales’ daughter, Jennifer, was horrified after finding that George was found only after the public began complaining about foul odors in the area and...
Robert Pattinson Shirtless!!
Maybe it’s old news, but I keep running into people talking about how hot the shirtless Robert Pattinson pictures are. Personally, I’d look a lot better making out with Ms. Bella Swan there. I mean really, put a little more UMPH in your BUMP Mr. Pattinson!
Check out the balding on that guy!
That’s better.
May 2009
6 posts
Woman Bites Off Boss' Penis
A 30-year-old hooker — I mean, secretary — having an affair with her boss accidentally bit off his penis in a freak accident.
The Singapore “couple” were in a parked car when the accident occurred. While hooker A was going down on a very happy man, a van backed up and struck the vehicle. Apparently the car got hit so hard that it caused the woman to sever her boss’...
Alina Percea Sold Her Virginity for $14,000
22-year-old Alina Percea auctioned off her virginity for $14,000 to pay for her college education. The auction, which took place in a Las Vegas brothel, has caused quite stir, to which Alina stated, “We live in a capitalist society. Why shouldn’t I be allowed to capitalize on my virginity?”
Um, probably because it makes you a WHORE.
On a funnier note, Alina was paid by her...
Catholic Church Damned for Rapes and Beatings
The Catholic Church is being damned by a 2,600-page report detailing an unfathomable amount of rapes, beatings, and molestations that have occurred within Catholic boarding schools and churches in the past 80 years.
Worst of all, Catholic officials from within the Vatican attempted to smut efforts to have the report released, which has, unfortunately, been unable to produce the names of the...
8-Year-Old Transgender Boy Begins Life Anew as a...
An 8-year-old Omaha boy will be starting his next year of elementary school as a girl. Ben’s parents first noticied his feminine tendencies when he was 2. When he was 3, Ben dressed up as a princess for Halloween.
Ben’s frustrations in looking like a boy but wanting to be a girl are expressed in his school drawings, where the drawing of a girl in a dress is circled, while an outcast...
1 tag
Dad Rips Out Son's Eyeballs and Eats Them
I’ve seen a lot of sick ass movies, hell, I was raised on Freddy Krueger and Chuckie, but nothing could ever prepare me to hear about how a 34-year-old father got high off of PCP and then brutally attacked his 4-year-old son.
On April 28th, 2009 wheelchair-bound Angelo Mendoza was on PCP when he (supposedly) had a stroke of insanity that led him to mutilate his child with his teeth. Mendoza...